Wednesday, August 16, 2017

Another short excursion...and the day after.

A Quickie:

We'd known for some time that my wife's niece's wedding was forthcoming.  Their special weekend approached and we headed out of town by car...

My daytime outfits enroute to/from this event were women's shorts and short-sleeve tops, with a pair of women's sandals.  To bystanders, my wife apparently was the lady of the pair, and I was neither "Sir nor Ma'am."   (This same phenomenon occurred on the way home.)

Enroute west by car, my wife noticed my pink nails (first time in 2+ months), and commented that she wished I had gotten clear.  I replied that they have been this way for a while (true), and it's hardly noticeable (except to her.)   Fortunately, the subject was dropped...

The wedding itself was a wonderful celebration.  And as I greeted the happy couple, I actually had tears of joy for them in my eyes...   (Since guys aren't supposed to cry, I wonder what this means for me?)  I wish for them a long and happy life together!

My dress-up outfit for the wedding was a blend of male and female...the men's part of it was the sport coat I wore at work till I retired.  (It was a bit snug at the waist when buttoned, but basically it still fit.)   Also, a pair of women's polyester dress slacks (which don't wrinkle, no matter what you do to them), black pantyhose, a women's short sleeve white shirt with shirt collar, and a nondescript necktie, which  I still can tie.   (All those years of tying one every day make it sort of like "you never forget how to ride a bike!")    And black patent ballet-style flats.  My nails were pink, my hair was in a relatively high ponytail, and I carried my purse... but wore no makeup or jewelry.

Some of the folks knew me, and addressed me by name.  Younger friends of the happy couple met us for the first time, and there was no issue - we are our son's parents.  (I couldn't tell if they believe we're a boy-girl couple or a girl-girl couple - because my given name is now used by females.)

However, at the reception afterwards, the answer became a bit clearer.I asked the female server for more water.  And I heard "yes Ma'am." When she returned with the water pitcher and filled my glass,  I thanked her.  Her reply:  "You're welcome Ma'am."  My wife was deep in conversation with the kids, thus they didn't hear the exchange.  (Which is fortunate.)

I found this quite interesting...my attire did not reek of femininity.  Does that mean I'm becoming effeminate in my everyday behavior?  Or since she approached me from the back, did the ponytail cause her to identify me as female?  The latter is possible, but I'll never know...

And the day after getting home from the trip, I stopped at the auto parts store in a nearby town - not the one where the guy in a skirt used to work.    :-(    I was wearing a shorts and women's tee outfit, with sandals, and was promptly identified as "Miss."  They even installed the wiper blades on my car for me, "so you don't mess up your nails, Miss."

Definitely another good day for me...

Mandy

6 comments:

  1. As a rule I like weddings. It is always bittersweet to see the women dressed so nicely. I both appreciate the effort that they make to look good and am jealous that I cannot be similarly attired.
    It really does seem that by and large you are giving off cues that tend to tip the scales towards the feminine side of being identified.
    Pat

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    Replies
    1. And the big news is that we may have another wedding to attend in November!!! Who knows how often I'll be seen as a woman?

      I'm not really sure how well I "pass" - there's that word again. But if I'm accepted as a woman, because of my hair, purse, nails, or for whatever reason, then I'm happy about that!

      You can be sure I'll keep trying - as often as possible.

      Mandy

      PS: I remembered to hit "reply" this time!

      Delete
  2. The key is to keep on keeping on. You tend to blend in well one way or the other. People are conditioned to place everyone they encounter into one basket or the other, male or female. You, at times, present them with a conundrum. Most want to get things right.
    Pat

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    1. Pat,

      As for 'Keeping on keeping on," you can be sure that I will. Even if I am interpreted as a woman when I'm not trying to...LOL!

      Mandy

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  3. Another encouraging post, Mandy. I love weddings but look forward to one where I can go unmistakably female. Sue x

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    Replies
    1. Sue,

      You and me too...but I suspect that day may be closer for you than it is for me!

      Mandy

      Delete

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